As a family law attorney of nearly thirteen (13) years, I have done divorce and/or custody mediation in one form or another for pretty much my whole thirteen year career as an attorney. I am formally trained in divorce and custody mediation and over the years I have successfully completed hundreds of mediations.  

Knowing how to litigate is important if you are also doing divorce/custody mediation. Being aware of what happens in court allows me to understand how things will likely be resolved by a “good” judge.  The potential outcomes in Court are definitely some of the topics that the parties discuss in mediation. I generally know what a “good judge will do in almost any set of circumstances, based upon my vast experience in divorce and family law litigation. Because of my experience, I also know what the common and difficult problems are after the divorce is finalized and how to avoid custody issues after the parties are divorced and/or separated.

There’s always a portion of what I do that has nothing to do with the law, but my understanding of people and their issues allows me to “craft” better resolutions while at the same time anticipating how each party will react to certain issues.  It is my substantial experience that allows the parties to reach a resolution on all outstanding issues.

I also teach the parties how to avoid ever having to go to court . For example, with custody there may be times where the timeshare needs to change because one of the parties' work hours or workdays change. I teach the parties how to do what’s called a “Stipulation and Order” so that they don’t have to go to Court. Or if one party loses their job or their pay changes dramatically and that affects child support, we will teach them how to do a ‘Stipulation and Order’ for that situation as well.

We can take many different scenarios into account and teach people to modify the contract in ways so they do not have to go to court. It has been my experience over the years that the parties that have done this process often do not ever go to court. Now that doesn’t mean they don’t come back to me. I have had several parties that have had to come back and modify their parenting plan, modify child support, modify their estates, and yet, each of them has made the decision not to go to Court. 

My belief is that litigation is contrary to successful co-parenting. As a family law attorney, I often tell people if you can avoid court, do so. Mediation puts people in a much better position to co-parent with each other. I find the financial issues and the distributions of assets and debts also has an impact on everything else in terms of custody and support and that this is true whether or not the parents are to work with each other for the support of the minor child.

What I love about the mediation process is that I help people avoid going to Court.  No Court divorces allow both parties to better understand what is occurring between them and the outcome usually makes more sense for the minor child.  A mediated resolution often allows both parties to feel better about themselves and about their outcome which usually entails a speedier and more successful divorce with lasting future benefits for both parties and their children.